So far '09 BLOWS!

Maybe I'm overly dramatic because I haven't had a ciggy in over a month,but I doubt anyone who has gone through what we have in the last month + a few days would be anything less than peeved.

I should have known when I was picking up the entire contents of my Christmas Tree(skirt, ornaments, EVERYTHING) from my dooryard in subzero windchill as the New Year arrived that it was going to suck. I had a premonition. I had a warning. And I brushed it away, when I should have taken it to heart and locked us all away and taken off for Katmandu.

As of this week, Emily is still on her heart monitor. The adhesive patches have torn her skin and the New Skin we were told to get to protect her skin, hurt her SO EFFING BADLY that she screamed for nearly an hour in the tub. What kind of "band aid" has 6.7% alcohol? My poor nephew was hospitalized for RSV right before the whole deal with Em happened and now my poor bro, Joe has Influenza A. The nasty one. We've been with them all at 2 birthday dinners this week, so tomorrow AM we have to head in to pick up Tamiflu for the whole crew. Thank God for insurance. Or we'd be looking at over $500. Which, thanks to a nice tax refund wouldn't ruin us right now, but that's gone MIA. So, AGAIN, thank God for insurance.

Jake(AKA Big Daddy) and I have always said that if it weren't for bad luck, we'd have none at all, but this is starting to just get a little ridiculous.

If only we could stop time...

This time eight years ago, I was moments away from meeting the guy that would make me a mom, the first time around. My son, the guy who saved my life, is 8 today.

Happy Birthday Trav! We love you...to the moon and back!

Just to clarify...

I DID NOT want for something to be wrong with my daughter, I was only trying to show that there was something wrong, enough for the second hospital to be quite freaked out by Em's presentation, but the first hospital sent us home.

Just because you tell Life that you've got it by the balls...

Doesn't mean life won't turn around and knock you on your ass.

The last 30 hours or so, Emily(lets just get it out there, OK. My youngest daughter is Emily) and I have been in and out of a couple hospitals, a cardiologists office for an emergency appt he drove from Portland for, and to see our Family Doc.

Yesterday, Emily thought she would be a Smurf for the say and be cyanotic. The first hospital, the one which claims its a Saint. Looked at her and sent us home. Later, at the Central Hospital... They ran EVERY TEST they could think of on her. Paged the Ped's Cardio and only let us go hom for 3.5 hours before we had to be back to see him. They did more tests on her this morning and she is now hooked up to a Holter Monitor(basically, a 24hr monitor/EKG thingamajig) so we can record her heart rate. She DOES have something wrong with her. Its called an SVT. SupraVentricular Tachycardia.

Also today, my bank called. The new checks we ordered. The ones I thought I had double checked the info on... Yeah, the ones that have the WRONG account number and I have 12 out there to be drawn on a non-account. I cried. On the phone. With the lady from the bank. Like.A.Baby.

ENOUGH ALREADY!!!!

The last 5 months in review... And a plan

How do I put this nicely. The last 5 months have been CRAPTASTIC. I try really hard to not let anyone know how really shitty things are, how we're having a tough time, or whatever it is we're dealing with at the moment. But, I feel like getting it out of my head will help me create a tackle it list, in hopes of getting back on our feet and into a routine again.

I had pneumonia for a grand total of 5 months last year. I dealt with it at the beginning of the year and then again for the last few months of it. I know those that have had it will be sympathetic to the situation, but it fucking SUCKED. School with the kids still hasn't gotten completely caught up from it all and I HATE THAT. Some days the whole this is so overwhelming we barely get the basics done, let alone all the FUN learning I wish we could. So, my resolution of the week, is to get all of our "paper" work printed and organized. We will be learning about the solar system for the remainder of the school year and there is much to prepare. Along with a history unit that none of us can agree on. I know many will say that I should just pick it, I'm the mom and teacher. Well, that isn't how we work. We decide together. And that will be decided this week. Printables, manipulatives and project materials will be received and organized.

The house is still in shambles after being sick for so long. I'm ashamed of how filthy I have allowed it to become. There is no excuse and I WILL get my house in order. ASAP.

Basically, everything is completely out of control and it desperately needs to be brought back in and together. I have the month of Feb. to get it back. Thats it. I am the one who needs a schedule and I need to set myself up with one. I think we'll all benefit from it.

Thankfully, I have sought help with Buckfield's Biggest Loser, instead of trying to do it all myself as I normally would have.

This whole post is a really good example of how my brain is working right now. Its just a mess. If you read all this shit, you deserve a cookie!